Why men ...

WHY MEN LOVE BEING MEN

1. We know stuff about tanks.
2. Only one suitcase required for a 5-day trip.
3. We can open our own jars.
4. We can go to the bathroom without a support group.
5. The same hair-style lasts for years -- maybe decades.

6. We can leave a motel bed unmade.
7. We can kill our own food.
8. We get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
9. Wedding plans take care of themselves.
10. If someone forgets to invite us to something, they can still be our friend.

11. Underwear is $10 a three-pack.
12. If you are 34 and single, nobody notices.
13. Everything on our faces stays the original color.
14. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
15. We don't have to clean the house if the meter-reader is coming.

16. Car mechanics tell us the truth.
17. We can sit quietly and watch a game with a friend for hours without thinking "He must be mad at me."
19. Gray hair and wrinkles add character.
20. We can drop by and see a friend without bringing a gift.

21. If another guy shows up at a party in the same outfit you just might become lifelong friends.
22. Your pals will never trap you with: "So, notice anything different?"
23. We are not expected to know the names of more than five colors.
24. We almost never have a "strap problem" in public.
25. We are totally unable to see wrinkles in our clothes.

26. We don't have to learn to spell a new last name.
27. We don't have to show below the neck.
29. Our belly usually hides our big hips.
30. One wallet, one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons.

31. We can do our nails with pocketknife.
32. We have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
33. Christmas shopping can be accomplished for 25 people on the day before Christmas and in 45 minutes.
34. We know nothing about "dust" and we don't care.
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35. Missing the occasional number is perfectly acceptable.