Five Rules to Remember in Life

This has been attributed to John Wayne, but that might just be Internet fiction. Even so, the sentiments are pretty good.

1. Money cannot buy happiness but it’s more comfortable to cry in a Mercedes than on a bicycle.
2. Forgive your enemy, but remember the ba….d’s name.
3. Help someone when they are in trouble, and they will remember you when they’re in trouble again.
4. Many people are alive only because it’s illegal to shoot them.
5. Alcohol does not solve any problems, but then again, neither does milk.